Apostasy, Part I

Over the past few months, the Lord has impressed the topic of apostasy on my heart. I had turned some of my attention to studying the characteristics of God, but He decided that I needed to change my focus. I can honestly say that in studying apostasy, I have gained a renewed fear of the Lord. I am very grateful for this renewed fear, and pray that it would only increase.

Apostasy is discussed numerous times throughout Scripture, but seems to be considerably reinforced in the pages of the New Testament. When apostasy is mentioned, it almost always appears with warnings to the brethren. In the mindset of the Apostles, they are warning the church members of apostasy, apostates, and the consequences of apostasy. They want the body to be diligent in not “falling away”, to “make their call and election sure”, and to “inherit the promises” of God. However, they also want the body to realize that apostasy is very real.

Apostasy, simply stated, is the abandonment of what one has voluntarily professed. In Christian terms, it is when one renounces, or rejects, their faith in God. We need to be careful and not imply that this rejection of their faith is verbal or visible. The Apostle John clearly writes about those who profess to be Christian with their mouth, but in reality are “antichrists”. These apostates were in the church fellowship and appeared to be believers, with a visible appearance of salvation, but eventually turned and rejected the truth in one form or another; often times taking others with them. Even the Lord Jesus discusses apostates and how He will answer them on the day of the Lord Jesus.

The passages of Scripture that I focused on initially are in the book of Hebrews, Chapter 6, verses 4-8. From the New King James Version, they read as follows:


“For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened, and have tasted the heavenly gift, and have become partakers of the Holy Spirit,

and have tasted the good word of God and the powers of the age to come,

if they fall away, to renew them again to repentance, since they crucify again for themselves the Son of God, and put Him to an open shame.

For the earth which drinks in the rain that often comes upon it, and bears herbs useful for those by whom it is cultivated, receives blessing from God;

but if it bears thorns and briers, it is rejected and near to being cursed, whose end is to be burned.”


Biblical scholars are divided on whom the author is talking about in the above passage. Is it Christians who simply turn from God for some reason, or is it people who believe they are Christians while not actually being Christians? If we look at the first verse of the above passage only (Heb 6:4), I believe the answer is quite clear. I believe that the author is talking about true Christians, and that this passage is a warning to us all regarding the testing of our faith.

The people being discussed have several qualities given them in verse 4, including “enlightened”, “having tasted the heavenly gift”, and “partakers of the Holy Spirit”. These three qualities alone (not including the additional ones in verse 5) paint a clear picture of a Christian.

First, they were “enlightened”. Enlightenment comes when God opens the eyes of a person to the magnitude of their sin, the holiness of God, and His righteous judgment which must come to all men. This enlightenment brings forth conviction in the heart of the enlightened. He finally sees himself as a sinner under God’s wrath, awaiting God’s judgment and his awaiting eternal death.

Secondly, they “have tasted the heavenly gift”. What is this gift from heaven which one tastes after being enlightened? I submit that this most precious gift from heaven is salvation. The conviction of enlightenment produced repentance which led to salvation.

2 Corinthians 7:10: For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation, not to be regretted; but the sorrow of the world produces death.

If a person were merely enlightened, they would not automatically be saved. Salvation is a heavenly gift given to those who are both enlightened and have truly repented out of godly sorrow. Many people can be enlightened and know that they are sinners, and yet refuse to repent. I certainly qualified as one, as it took awhile for my enlightenment to actually produce the godly sorrow that I needed to truly repent. At first, I had a worldly sorrow that never led to my salvation. Praise God that He continued to convict my heart and soul!

Thirdly, they have become “partakers of the Holy Spirit”. They are not merely knowledgeable in the existence of the Holy Spirit. They don’t simply confess the Holy Trinity. They have become partakers of the Holy Spirit! The Greek word used here is “metochos”, which means to share in. Men can only share in the Holy Spirit once their spirits have been made alive through the heavenly gift of salvation! The Holy Spirit indwells us, and is a gift to all who believe!

Titus 3:5b: ...but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit,

Ephesians 1:13-14: In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, to the praise of His glory

All true believers have been enlightened. All true believers have tasted of the heavenly gift. All true believers have become partakers of the Holy Spirit. These are three qualities that only apply to believers. No non-believer will ever be partakers of, or sealed with, or indwelt by, the Holy Spirit.

The writer of Hebrews then continues to give additional qualities regarding the people he is referring to, including “tasted the good word of God” and “[tasted] the powers of the age to come”. I believe that the author simply continues showing the progression of a Christian with these qualities. They “tasted the good word of God”, meaning they have desired it as a babe desires milk.

1 Peter 2:1-3: Therefore, laying aside all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and all evil speaking, as newborn babes, desire the pure milk of the word, that you may grow thereby, if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is gracious.

They also have tasted “the powers of the age to come”. Not only do they know about, but they have tasted all the spiritual blessings given to believers! This is not to imply that they have all the miraculous gifts demonstrated by the Apostles and the early Church, but the powers of the age to come given to all who believe!

Ephesians 1:3: Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ,

We have been elected, predestined, saved, given faith which endures, can pray without ceasing, and will be glorified on the day of the Lord Jesus! And that simply isn’t even a proper beginning list to describe all the powers of the age to come! How else can we truly obey the Lord Jesus, but by His spiritual blessings which He pours out upon His children.

Matthew 5:44-45: “But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and the unjust.

Now that we have established that the passages in Hebrews 6:4-8 refer to Christians, what does it mean to “fall away” in verse 6? Do not the Scriptures declare that once saved, forever saved?

John 10:27-29: “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me. And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of My Father’s hand.

The Lord Jesus simply states that His sheep, who He gives eternal life, will never perish nor can they be snatched out of His hand. Ephesians 1:14, which is quoted above, tells us that believers are “sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession”. Once we are sealed; once we are His sheep, we cannot fall away, praise God!

Falling away, as implied by this passage, is the complete removal or undoing of what God has done for a believer. He strips him of the Holy Spirit and ceases giving His grace. God, who has begun a good work, simply stops. This falling away is not merely a believer falling into sin, from which He can “renew them again unto repentance”, but something much worse. Believers fall when they sin against God, but we do not fall away. I submit that believers can never “fall away”, as it makes God less than holy.

Philippians 1:6: being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ;

What God starts, He finishes. He completes every work that He begins! There are no exceptions given! Once you are a new creation in Christ. You simply cannot return to your old self.

2 Corinthians 5:17: Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.

Then why does the author mention “fall[ing] away” in verse 6? He uses verse 6 to show that if one were to “fall away”, they could never be saved again. Jesus Christ died to take away the sins of man, once and for all. Just as it is impossible for a believer to “fall away”, it is equally impossible for someone who has fallen away to be “renewed” again to repentance, or saved again.

Why? Simply put, it shows that Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross was not enough to save the believer the first time, thus He must be crucified a second time to allow the believer to be saved again. Since Jesus Christ died once for all, He will not be crucified a second time. To believe otherwise puts Him to an “open shame”, since His word is no longer truth.

Romans 6:10: For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all, but the life that He lives, He lives to God.

Since Jesus will not be crucified a second time, and since believers cannot fall away, what is the purpose of this passage? I believe the purpose is two-fold.

First, it is a warning to all who profess Jesus Christ as Lord. As Christians, we are commanded to be holy, without blame (or spot), and righteous. Just as God demanded that the Israelites remained a pure people, separate from the world, so He demands the same of us. We fall, and He is gracious to renew us again to repentance. However, our entire goal is to be like Jesus Christ…to imitate Him. We should abhor our sins just as God Himself abhors them!

If, on the other hand, we find ourselves delighting in our sins there is a great cause for concern. If we begin lowering God’s standard so that we “feel better” about sinning, there is a great cause for concern. If we begin justifying our sins because we are “good enough”, or “deserve” them (deserving of evil?), there is a great cause for concern.

Thus we have a warning! If we find ourselves falling over and over, growing easier day by day, and aren’t renewed again to repentance, we must examine ourselves through the eyes of God. We must seek the Lord and ask the hard question of “Am I even saved?” We should fear sin in our lives, and hate it with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength! It’s not simply that “a little sin isn’t too bad”, but “any sin is horrific and an abomination to the Lord”, whom we profess to love.

2 Corinthians 13:5: Examine yourselves as to whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Do you not know yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?-unless indeed you are disqualified.

Secondly, we have one of the greatest reasons to offer up praises and thanksgiving to the Lord! We who examine ourselves and know we are in the faith, we who are Christians, and we who are the body of Christ can NEVER fall away! His promises to us are complete, unchanging, and forever! His grace is sufficient! By His grace we are saved!

As we encounter various trials throughout the days, let us remember what God has promised us! While the persecutions and trials can produce untold grief and sorrow, remember that we who are His will be His forever! When your mind is only focused on the burden, remember the salvation of Christ! It should bring forth a torrent of praise and thanksgiving! It should calm any storm, even if for but a little while. Simply tell yourself “I am His and He is mine”…forever.

So, I started on apostasy and ended up with praising God for not allowing believers to ever fall away. When I began looking into this, I certainly didn’t expect this. However, who am I to direct God? I am simply amazed at what He has shown me, and how different my worldly expectations were going into this. Of course, this is only Part I. Part II will cover 2 Timothy 3, and address apostasy more, Lord willing!

In Christ,
Ric

Ponderings

I just wanted to put up a quick post regarding my recent thoughts.  I believe my next "paper" will be on the characteristics of God.  I think that only when we truly begin to understand His attributes will we truly begin to understand how great He is, and how we should desire holiness and obedience above everything.  This one will be somewhat difficult for me, and that's why I really want to do it.

May God be glorified by us all today!

Blessings,
Ric

Remarriage

(This Position Paper was originally started in July/Aug. 2010 and finished Sept./Oct. 2010. It was written along side the Position Paper on Divorce...below.)

In studying God’s word regarding divorce, it was only natural to continue onto the topic of remarriage. During this trial, there have been times when I asked myself questions such as “If we get divorced, should I seek to be remarried” and “Is it God’s will for me to even consider being remarried”. Separation and divorce to a Christian is, in my opinion, much harder to deal with than the death of a spouse (though I have no basis in fact). Half of your whole is torn from you, though you know that it is in opposition to God’s will. If your spouse had died, you would at least have some comfort knowing that it was God’s will – and the death of a believer simply allows them to enter into the presence of the Lord sooner. Even Paul struggled over living here on the Earth and dying and going home to be with the Lord (Phil 1:21-26).

Ok, back to the topic of remarriage. If you’ve already read the positional paper on divorce, then you probably know what to expect in this paper. In the most simplistic answer, if God hates divorce and no one should get divorced, then remarriage after divorce is not acceptable because the circumstances should never allow for it. Only God can break the marriage covenant, which He created. The Lord allows for this in one instance only, as shown in the following passages:

Romans 7:1-3: Or do you not know, brethren (for I speak to those who know the law), that the law has dominion over a man as long as he lives? For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man.

1 Cor 7:39: A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

In these two passages, the wife is not allowed to remarry as long as her husband lives. This thought is reiterated again in 1 Cor 7:11, regarding a believing wife who has “departed” her husband. As I mentioned in the paper on divorce, I believe that some extremely dangerous or harmful circumstances are required for this "departing" to happen (physical abuse, murderous threats, etc). In the preceding verse, Paul says this:

1 Cor 7:10: Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband.

Though written by Paul, he states directly that this is a command from the Lord Jesus himself! To refuse to follow it is an act of disobedience and is sin.

1 Cor 7:11: But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.

Again, the wife who left her husband is commanded to remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. There is simply no option for remarriage given. From a husband's standpoint, he simply is commanded not to divorce his wife (thus making the topic of remarriage after divorce moot for him).  Again, remember that Paul is giving a command from the Lord!

Paul then turns to the marriage between a believer and a non-believer in 1 Cor 7:12-16. Here, we have one of the verses that people have used to justify remarriage after divorce. Let us look at 1 Cor 7:15-16.

1 Cor 7:15-16: But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?

As stated in the paper on divorce, 1 Cor 7:15 is simply commanding the believer to allow the unbeliever to divorce him or her. The believer is not bound to refuse divorce because God says it is wrong. Instead, the Lord removes the believer from this bondage, which would most likely result in fighting, anger, and bitterness between the believer and the unbeliever. The simple act of allowing for a peaceful divorce might lead to the eventual salvation of the unbeliever, praise God! What about remarriage of the believer after such a divorce?

The word used for bondage in 1 Cor 7:15 is douloo, which means to make a servant or slave. Paul uses a different word in 1 Cor 7:39 for bound (deo), which means to pledge to give oneself in marriage. They come from completely different root words. That in itself shows that Paul is not allowing the marriage bond to be broken in the divorce between a believer and an unbeliever, but simply allows the divorce to occur peacefully.

Let us examine additional passages that continue to support this position.

Luke 16:18: "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced from her husband commits adultery.”

The Lord Jesus attacks the issue of remarriage very directly here. In God’s eyes, human divorce simply doesn’t end the marriage covenant which God created. How can man remove that which God has created? While we can disobey His will (which Jesus calls adultery in this passage) and sin against Him, we cannot change His laws. The Lord gave no exceptions.

Mark 10:11-12: So He said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery."

The Lord Jesus not only reaffirms his stance on remarriage (as seen in Luke 16:18), but elaborates on it by showing that no matter who divorces whom, any remarriage by the person divorcing is adultery. For the person who is being divorced, remarriage is not allowed based on the previous discussion of 1 Cor 7:15-16 above. Again, the Lord gives no exceptions to this. It’s also important to note that this passage directly follows the Lord’s teaching that we are not to divorce (Mark 10:2-9).

While I have already touched on Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9 in the paper on divorce, I wish to reexamine these passages.

Matt 5:32b: “…and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”

The Lord Jesus makes a very simple and powerful statement here. To marry a woman who has been divorced is adultery, and there are no exceptions.

Matthew 19:9: "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."

Again, I believe that this passage is in regards to divorce during the betrothal period, which God allows for. This is what allowed Joseph to “put away” Mary after she was found with child while they were betrothed. If he had divorced Mary, he would then be free to marry someone else. However, Mary would not have been allowed to remarry, since that would result in adultery.

There are a few other points I wish to make, though my position regarding remarriage is complete.

First and foremost, I certainly do not want anyone thinking that they need to “make things right” if they have already become remarried. The blood of Christ can cover ANY sin which we have committed. You simply need to acknowledge and confess your sin regarding divorce and/or remarriage before the Lord and know that He is merciful to forgive us. Divorce and remarriage are not unforgivable sins! If you have any questions, please talk to your pastor or write me. I will offer up all the wisdom I can!

Secondly, if a husband or wife divorces their spouse, becomes married to another person, and then leaves that person (through either divorce or the death of the new spouse), that person cannot then return to their original spouse. This is better said in the following passage:

Deu 24:1-4: When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, when she has departed from his house, and goes and becomes another man's wife, if the latter husband detests her and writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her as his wife, then her former husband who divorced her must not take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the LORD, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.

Thirdly, a believer and an unbeliever should not marry. I offer up the following passages to affirm this:

1 Cor 7:39: A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

The phrase “only in the Lord” is saying that she is to marry only another believer and not an unbeliever who is not “in the Lord”. 1 John 4:13 states “By this we know that we abide in Him, and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit.”

2 Cor 6:14-15: Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?

Finally, and this is one of the hardest parts for me, those of us who are facing divorce or separation from our spouse must remain focused on the Lord. I face the attacks of the flesh continually, as I go through each day without my wife. My morning prayers are that I might walk in the spirit and deny my flesh. I ask God to help me use the strength He has already given me so that I don’t succumb to the sins of the flesh. I would be a liar if I said it was easy. It is a constant battle, and one I must always be on guard against. When the flesh attacks, I simply remember two things; which I take to the Lord in prayer.

1. We have already been blessed with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ. (Eph 1:3).  This includes a spirit of power (2 Tim 1:7) with which we can resist the devil (Jam 4:7).

2. We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. (Phil 4:13)

Remember, His promises to us are eternal, unchanging, and perfect. Draw near to Him and He will draw near to you!

Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

In Christ,
Ric

Divorce

(This Position Paper was originally written July/Aug. 2010)

I wanted to share with you what I believe the Lord has revealed to me over the past month or so regarding the major trial that my family is currently grieving over. I have been praying for wisdom almost constantly since this trial began, with a greater focus on the relationship between Shari and I since she began staying elsewhere. I have talked with a lawyer, and the worldly wisdom they offered would not surprise any of us. I have also done a lot of reading on various topics related to this trial that numerous others have faced and discussed over the centuries. I seek to do what is right in the eyes of the Lord, regardless of what the world, the flesh, or the evil one throws at me. From that perspective alone, I offer the following position on which I stand.

“Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” – Matthew 19:6b, Mark 10:9

The Lord Jesus spoke this directly, in response to the Pharisees testing Him on the topic of divorce. Deuteronomy 24:1, where Moses commands the Israelites concerning divorce, is the test which the Pharisees are trying to trap Jesus in.

Deuteronomy 24:1: "When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house,”

Matthew 19:3-6: And some Pharisees came to Him, testing Him, and saying “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause at all?” And He answered and said, “Have you not read, that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh’? Consequently they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”

Instead of Jesus being trapped in a place where He would have to either agree or disagree with Moses’ teaching, He responded by accusing the Pharisees with not recognizing God’s true intent for marriage. It appears that the Pharisees had allowed Moses’ teaching on divorce, specifically the justification of “some uncleanness in her”, to become very broad. Jesus then quoted Genesis 1:27 and 2:24, and then concluded that they are no longer two, but one flesh. He then closed with His command, “Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate”.

This exact theme is then repeated in Mark 10:2-9. Jesus then discusses the topic of remarriage after divorce (Mark 10:11-12), but I won’t begin discussing that topic in this paper (it's coming next). What Mark added in his words was the reasoning behind why Moses allowed for divorce – simply put, because of the hardness of man’s heart.

Mark 10:2-9: The Pharisees came and asked Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” testing Him. And He answered and said to them, “What did Moses command you?” They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce, and to dismiss her.” And Jesus answered and said to them, “Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. But from the beginning of the creation, God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’, so then what God has joined together, let not man separate.

The Lord Jesus returned the standard of marriage and divorce to God’s original intention. Simply put, God created marriage (it is not a social institution) and thus only He has the right to abolish it. This teaching was so “radical” from the views at that time that the disciples immediately began to question Jesus about marriage in general (Matthew 19:10 and Mark 10:10).

Many arguments are made regarding “acceptable” divorce by quoting the Lord Jesus in Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9. I started out with Matthew 19:6 and Mark 10:9 to set the bar for “acceptable” divorce based on what Jesus said. Simply put, there are no “acceptable” grounds for divorce if my interpretations of Matthew 19:6 and Mark 10:9 are correct. However, did the Lord give an “acceptable” reason for man to divorce in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9? My response is no, and yes.

Matthew 5:31-32: Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces (apoluo) his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces (apoluo) his wife for any reason except sexual immorality (porneia) causes her to commit adultery (moichao); and whoever marries a woman who is divorced (apoluo) commits adultery (moichao).

Matthew 19:7-9: They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give her a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, Moses permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality (porneia), and marries another, commits adultery (moichao); and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery (moichao).”

Notice here that Jesus states that any reason for divorce except “sexual immorality” leads to sin. How then can we reconcile the passages – with Matthew 19:6 and Mark 10:9 saying that only God can separate a man from his wife, and Matthew 5:32 and 19:9 saying that a man can separate from his wife over sexual immorality? I believe the answer is found in the Greek text, which I alluded to above:

Moicheuo (root) –means “to commit adultery”, and is used in the context of adultery during marriage. It is used in Matthew 5:27, 5:28, 19:18, Mark 10:19, etc. Also, the derived forms (moichao, meaning “commit adultery” in the middle voice, and moicheia, meaning “adultery”) are used in places such as Matthew 5:32, 15:19, and 19:19, Mark 7:21, 10:1,1 and 10:12, etc.

Porneia – means “sexual immorality”, which has a much broader meaning than adultery. (Matthew 5:32 and 19:9) It is used to refer to incest (1 Cor 5:1) and premarital sex (1 Cor 7:2). Jesus himself was accused by the Pharisees of being “born of sexual immorality” (porneia) in John 8:41. They were denying the virgin birth of the Lord Jesus.

“For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries (moicheia), fornications (porneia), thefts, false witness, blasphemies.” – Matthew 15:19

Matthew himself saw a distinction between both words, as he uses both of them together when listing out vices in Matthew 15:19. Also, both Matthew 5:32 and 19:9 use porneia as an exception shortly after having used moichao to refer to adultery. Thus, the two words must have a different meaning.

If Jesus is giving us an exception for when a man to divorce his wife after marriage, the word used (porneia) would allow legitimate grounds for divorce over many “sexual immoralities”. I submit that this could include such things as your spouse committing emotional adultery (adultery in the heart), your spouse struggling with “wandering eyes”, your spouse viewing explicit material/movies, etc. Because of that, I don’t believe that this exception was given to give us broad grounds with which we can divorce our spouse.

What then is Jesus referring to in Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9? I believe that if we examine Matthew 1:19 and John 8:41, we gain an understanding of what the Lord Jesus was saying.

Matthew 1:19: Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not wanting to make her a public example, was minded to put (apoluo) her away secretly.

John 8:41b: Then they said to Him, “We were not born of fornication (porneia); we have one Father--God.”

The word for “to put” in Matthew 1:19, apoluo, is the same word translated as divorce in Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9. Mary was betrothed to Joseph when she was found with child, but they were not married (they were married in Matthew 1:24). Thus, Joseph sought to divorce Mary over her sexual immorality (porneia, as the Pharisees falsely accused in John 8:41) during the betrothal but before they were married.

The Jewish people viewed betrothal as a very serious commitment for a man and a woman, unlike today’s worldly and glib attitude toward engagement. I believe Jesus was saying that a man can divorce his wife during the betrothal period if she is sexually immoral during that time; thus He was also justifying Joseph in his desire to put away (divorce) Mary, which Matthew had previously mentioned in Matthew 1:19.

Thus, I return to my previous answer of “no, and yes” to the question “did the Lord give an ‘acceptable’ reason for a man to divorce”. I believe that during the betrothal period but prior to marriage, a man can divorce his wife on the grounds of sexual immorality. I also believe that, once married, no man can divorce his wife for any reason. Consequently, this holds true for a wife divorcing her husband. Only God can separate that which He has joined together.

Is this viewpoint consistent with the whole of scripture? I believe it is.

1 Corinthians 7:10-11: Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.

This passage clearly states that divorce is not an option; however it seems to contain a provision that if a wife departs (though Paul doesn’t the reasoning for this departure), she is to remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. The word for depart is chorizo, which means “to place a room between (i.e. part)”, and is the same word the Lord Jesus uses in Matthew 19:6b and Mark 10:9 when He said “Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate (chorizo).”

Paul already stated that this command was from the Lord, so it only makes sense that Paul would use the identical word that Jesus used. So, the provision indicates that if the wife leaves her husband (again, we don’t know the reason for leaving, though it can be implied that something very severe is occurring, such as life threatening abuse or some other horrific condition), she should remain unmarried or be reconciled. This verse never allows for divorce, but shows that those who have been separated should at least seek reconciliation.

Verses 10 and 11 seem to be directed at married couples who are both believers, since Paul starts out verse 12 by saying “But to the rest I, not the Lord, say…” This is now contrasting the previous two verses, since Paul states this is directed at “the rest”. Paul then continues to discuss marriage between a believer and a non-believer, and this is continued through verse 16.

1 Corinthians 7:15: If the unbelieving partner desires to separate, let it be so; in such a case the brother or sister is not bound. For God has called us to peace.

I believe that this passage can be understood to mean that if an unbeliever seeks a divorce while in a marriage, then the believer is actually commanded to allow it to happen. The believer is not to be bound as a slave, and likely in a state of conflict and/or grief, to the unbeliever. As a child of God, we are called to be children of peace. If the unbeliever departs, then the believer is free in letting him or her go. However, the believer is the passive party, not the active party, in the separation.

Romans 7:1-3: Or do you not know, brethren (for I speak to those who know the law), that the law has dominion over a man as long as he lives? For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man.

1 Corinthians 7:39: A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

Both Romans 7:1-3 and 1 Corinthians 7:39 continue to show that a woman is bound to her husband until he dies. The converse of this would also be true, that a husband is bound to his wife until she dies. There is no mention of divorce to break the bonds of the law. Only God has the authority to separate that which He has joined together.

Malachi 2:16: “For the LORD God of Israel says That He hates divorce, For it covers one’s garment with violence,” Says the LORD of hosts. “Therefore take heed to your spirit, That you do not deal treacherously.”

Clearly, if the LORD God hates divorce, we should walk in obedience to Him. Scripture is filled with imagery of our relationship (and Israel’s) with our Lord as a marriage. We don’t deserve Him, and we walk in disobedience to Him daily, but He has promised never to ‘divorce’ us. Are we not called to be imitators of Christ?

I close with this passage from Jeremiah 3:1-15:

“They say, ‘If a man divorces his wife, And she goes from him And becomes another man’s, May he return to her again?’ Would not that land be greatly polluted? But you have played the harlot with many lovers; Yet return to Me,” says the Lord. “Lift up your eyes to the desolate heights and see: Where have you not lain with men? By the road you have sat for them Like an Arabian in the wilderness; And you have polluted the land With your harlotries and your wickedness. Therefore the showers have been withheld, And there has been no latter rain. You have had a harlot’s forehead; You refuse to be ashamed. Will you not from this time cry to Me, ‘My Father, You are the guide of my youth? Will He remain angry forever? Will He keep it to the end?’ Behold, you have spoken and done evil things, As you were able.”

The Lord said also to me in the days of Josiah the king: “Have you seen what backsliding Israel has done? She has gone up on every high mountain and under every green tree, and there played the harlot. And I said, after she had done all these things, ‘Return to Me.’ But she did not return. And her treacherous sister Judah saw it.

Then I saw that for all the causes for which backsliding Israel had committed adultery, I had put her away and given her a certificate of divorce; yet her treacherous sister Judah did not fear, but went and played the harlot also.

So it came to pass, through her casual harlotry, that she defiled the land and committed adultery with stones and trees.

And yet for all this her treacherous sister Judah has not turned to Me with her whole heart, but in pretense,” says the Lord.

Then the Lord said to me, “Backsliding Israel has shown herself more righteous than treacherous Judah. Go and proclaim these words toward the north, and say: ‘Return, backsliding Israel,’ says the Lord; ‘I will not cause My anger to fall on you. For I am merciful,’ says the Lord; ‘I will not remain angry forever. Only acknowledge your iniquity, That you have transgressed against the Lord your God, And have scattered your charms To alien deities under every green tree, And you have not obeyed My voice,’ says the Lord.

“Return, O backsliding children,” says the Lord; “for I am married to you. I will take you, one from a city and two from a family, and I will bring you to Zion. And I will give you shepherds according to My heart, who will feed you with knowledge and understanding.

No matter how much we disobey our God, He will not break His marriage covenant with us. May we be quick to repent and turn from our sins.

I understand that what I have presented above is extremely “conservative” (I apologize, as I couldn’t think of a better word) and is probably not the view held by many (if any) of you. I am certainly not here to argue over my viewpoint on Biblical divorce. I simply want to share with you what I believe the Lord has revealed to me. All the above, though I wrote it (save the scriptural references!), is by no means unique to me. I can take no credit for this material. I’ve been reading a lot of material with numerous positions, praying for wisdom continually, and waiting patiently for the Lord to grant it to me, which I believe he has done. Thus, all the credit is His.

When I started reading, studying, and praying, I was actually looking for grounds to divorce my wife. She had already left the house, and I was under what seemed like continual grief. I even remember breathing a sigh of relief when I turned to 1 Cor 7:15 and thought to myself “Since she has departed and has talked about her desire for divorce, I can divorce her.” I am glad that I didn’t rush out right then and call the lawyer. I am very, very grateful that the Lord continued to burden me over this, while giving me the patience and wisdom to continue seeking His will.

Since I have realized this viewpoint, the Lord has given me a great peace. I have fully accepted this position, and am committed to being steadfast in my resolve to do what I believe is His will regarding divorce, which I have presented here. While this trial is very difficult and the grief I have seems almost unbearable at times (well, almost continually), I am filled with joy knowing that the Lord is with me and will never forsake me.

Finally, for this trial’s end I pray the following:

Though it tarries, wait for it; Because it will surely come, It will not tarry. (Habakkuk 2:3b)

Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord!

In Christ,
Ric

FOLLOW-UP: Since I wrote this paper, two significant events have happened. The first was that I allowed fear and anger over certain events and accusations during this trial to cause me to stray from the above position. The straying was entirely my fault, and was the result of my disobedience to the Lord. God doesn't give us a spirit of fear, so when we act out of fear we almost certainly are not doing so in obedience to Him.

By allowing myself to give into fear and anger, I actually went to a lawyer and began divorce proceedings against my wife. I felt "justified" from two thoughts. First, to "divorce" means to separate from, which my wife had actually done. I thought to myself "Does God care about the act of separation, or the worldly and 'legal' aspect of divorce". The second thought was "How did they view this in the Westminster Confession of Faith". I sought out the Confession of Faith and noticed that they allowed for divorce once your spouse abandons you (though it's not as simple as that, and I didn't pray and seek the wisdom I needed to realize what they were truly allowing for at the time). Armed with such poor justifications, I ran forward and straight into disobedience.

A few days later, my wife was served papers. Needless to say, that day was probably the lowest and most heartbreakingly painful day of my life. But God, who is rich in mercy, turned that horrible day into a day of rejoicing! For the first time in what seemed like forever, my wife and I actually talked. We poured out our hearts to each other, cried, and talked! Did I mention that we talked?! Before the sunrise the following morning, I had already contacted my lawyer and requested a "Motion To Dismiss", which was later granted, praise God! The Lord used my terrible mistake for good, and returned peace to my spirit!

Since that day, my wife and I continue to talk. Unfortunately, it seems she still desires to divorce me. I simply stand in the amazing peace that the Lord has given me since I dismissed my divorce action and helped to expunge the records. It's a wonderful picture of God's "forgive and forget" treatment toward those who repent, as seen in Psalm 103, and is the reason He has given me such peace. When we walk in His ways and draw near to Him, we begin to properly understand and use the spiritual blessings that are already ours (Eph 1:3).

No matter what happens, how difficult or grievous anything is, or how disobedient anyone else is, I know that I am firmly seated in God's hand, from which nothing can snatch me away. I pray that I continue to walk in obedience, with a proper fear of the Lord, and with a growing spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him!

Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure. (Phil 2:12-13)

I Have Returned!

Wow, after almost two years of posting absolutely nothing, and with very little to build upon, I have returned to continue my blogging adventure. So much has happened over the past two years, and I want to share some of those things with people who might be interested. The Lord has continued to be gracious to me and my family, because the Lord is good! Is it not God who sends rain on the just and the unjust, and makes His sun rise on the evil and the good?

As some of you know, my wife, my girls, and I are going through a very difficult trial. My wife moved out roughly 3 months ago. She was and continues to be under very heavy burdens, many if not most of which were caused by me. Over the past several years, I had been growing more and more consumed with myself and what I wanted to do without much regard to my wife or my family. I would return from work and sit on the computer, spending much of my time focused there and not on my family. The weekends, unfortunately, were not much different. Sure, the family would still do things, but those times were growing fewer and fewer, and my wife was being forced to “do it alone”. I was still spending time with the girls, though certainly not nearly as much as I should have been. I was still spending time with my wife, though usually when it was time to go to bed. Needless to say, I was consumed with pure selfishness, or pride if you will, and I didn’t see the burden it was putting on my wife. I most certainly was not loving my wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her (Eph 5:25).

Over the course of the past several years, the Lord was lovingly chastising me for my behavior. That in itself is a glorious thing, since He chastises His children. However, my conviction never really lasted long. I would give up some of my weights and sins for a time, but would always return. That reminds me a lot of Proverbs 26:11 and 2 Peter 2:22, sadly.

As a dog returns to his own vomit, So a fool repeats his folly. (Proverbs 26:11)

But it has happened to them according to the true proverb: "A dog returns to his own vomit," and, "a sow, having washed, to her wallowing in the mire." (2 Peter 2:22)

In its most basic form, I was refusing to repent from this weight and sin. I would address the issue by leaning on my own strength, which quickly would be overcome and fail. I praise God that He finally poured out such conviction over my spirit that I was driven to true repentance over my sin. However, I had already done a lot of “damage” to my wife and family. I remember standing before my whole family the day following my repentance, telling them that my sin was inexcusable but that the Lord had led me to repentance and had forgiven me. I then asked them to do the same thing.

I will never know the burden I placed on my wife of my family during those years. From my wife’s perspective it, along with her other burdens, were heavy enough that she felt that leaving me was the only way out. My youngest girls must now face the consequences of sin by “bouncing” back and forth between my wife and me. While I know that I am not “solely” responsible for all the burdens, I know that I contributed a lot. Sin is never without consequences.

Over the past few months since she moved out, I have had a lot of time to read, study, and pray over things. I have put a lot of time and tears into two topics, namely divorce and remarriage (for my own sake), and thought that I would share my position with everyone. I also figure that my posts can be more frequent in the future, given my much wiser use of the time God gives me. I know that the Lord has given me a lot of wisdom throughout this trial in answer to countless prayers, and I would be a fool not to share it with everyone.

I have found several verses that have greatly encouraged me, and this is one of them:

My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (James 1:2-6)

Let us all pray, asking for wisdom, and have the faith to wait diligently for the Lord to supply us with it. His timing is perfect, while ours is anything but. In this we learn patience.

Grace be with you all!

In Christ,
Ric

A Grieving Spirit, Yet Praising God

Olivia Joy Crooks
5 Oct. 2008 - 26 Nov. 2008

Our God is a holy and righteous God. His good and perfect will be done. He alone is worthy of praise.

“For the Lord is great and greatly to be praised; He is also to be feared above all gods.” 1Chr 16:25 (NKJV)

“The Lord is righteous in all His ways, Gracious in all His works.” Psa 145:17 (NKJV)

“For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts.” Isa 55:9 (NKJV)

This Thanksgiving Day, while my spirit is grieved with our loss, I will offer praise and thanksgiving to our God Most High. I look at all I have – family, home, job, finances, material gifts, friends, health, and so much more, and realize that everything is a gift from God. I have done absolutely nothing to deserve these things. In fact, while I was His enemy, He died for me. While I broke His laws continually, He loved me unconditionally. While I looked toward the world, He kept His eyes focused on me. Instead of letting my die in my sin under his wrath, He then took my sins away and covered me in a robe of righteousness. He IS my God and I shall have no other. He Is my Lord, Savior, God, and King. He IS worthy of my praise!

Have a blessed Thanksgiving. Remember, all good and perfect gifts come from above.

Grace be with you!

Blessings in Christ,
Ric

Is God Punishing Us? Never!

I still don't think the full realization of God's recent "great" blessing on the lives of me and my family has occurred in my weak mind. I'm not talking about waking up this morning alive. I'm also not talking about every beat of my heart or every breath of my lungs. It's nothing financial, but it is material. It's one of the few material blessings that truly matter to God. It is one of the greatest blessings that our Heavenly Father can offer anyone.

Yesterday afternoon, I sat my two youngest daughters down (along with my wife and oldest daughter) and told them that God has given us a most precious gift - another child. While they were excited with mixed emotions, the full realization hasn't occurred in their minds either. I would go so far as to say that none of us have fully realized the scope of God's love with this blessing.

Back when my wife and I first thought we might be pregnant, we kept leaning on our previous conclusion that our youngest daughter Alyssa, now almost 6, was our last. She had come almost two years after Hannah, as an answer to prayers about a sister, best friend, and playmate for Hannah. The two of them would grow up together, helping one another with encouragement, joy, and support throughout their lives. It was "perfect". Our family was complete. At least, it was complete in our minds.

"Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men." - 1 Cor 1:25 (NKJV)

Obviously, God's good and perfect will knows exactly what we need and when we need it. He has deemed it important that we have another child. Praise Him! Even now, I can perfectly remember the birth of my daughters and the emotions (and tears) that washed over me. I remember my lips praising our Heavenly Father for such beautiful gifts. Not only are our daughters precious gifts, but the ability for me to recall those moments with such clarity are wonderful blessings. God is so good!

"Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward." - Psa 127:3 (NKJV)

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning." - Jam 1:17 (NKJV)

He has elected my family to have another child. I don't understand why, but I am confident that His plans for us are perfect. I am confident in His will being done. I am not concerned about our relatively small house. I am not concerned about the size of my car (or my wife's truck), knowing that they won't fit six of us.

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." - 2 Tim 1:7 (NKJV)

I will lean on our Heavenly Father to provide the wisdom, understanding, and blessings we need. Where He leads, we will follow. What He asks of us, we will do. How can we refuse Him, after He has once again blessed us so very richly? Father, I don't understand your plans for us at this time, but I trust you completely; knowing that your good and perfect will be done at the appointed time. Lord, I praise you for your power and love! Lord, I thank you for your grace and mercy! Your grace is sufficient for us all!

So, President-Elect Barack Hussein Obama, are we being "punished with a baby"? Is it a "mistake" on our part? Woe to those who believe it is.

Please pray for my family and our unborn child. Ask that God's will be done. That alone is sufficient in comforting us completely. Grace be with you!

Blessings,
Ric Crooks